Wap!

If you have known me for any length of time you know that I am not the most outgoing person, particularly around people that I don’t know. Over the course of my high school experience God really worked on my lack of boldness. I feel that there is definitely a confidence in me now that wasn’t ever there before. However, I am still not very outgoing and I tend to battle this on a regular basis. Some of it is my personality, and I accept that. I will never be the person that always speaks what is on her mind – I will never be the extremely social person who thrives off of other people. I will probably always have a desire to think things through before I take action – I will always enjoy sitting in the background and observing what is happening without any desire to be part of it - and I’m perfectly fine with that. It’s part of who I am. But there are certainly circumstances where I wish I could force myself to be loud and almost rash. When a friend makes a stupid mistake, I sometimes feel that my firm and quiet discussion and reasoning through of their choice isn’t as effective as a wap over the head and a proverbial slap on the hand might be. And there are certainly circumstances in which I NEED to be unreserved. There are times when I sit in large of groups of people and I look for the people that I know and am comfortable with and I won’t bother to meet anyone else. Why would I need to be the one to initiate conversation with someone I have never met? I have a terrible problem with stepping out of my comfort zone. I realize that this is completely selfish. There are people out there who are searching for a friend, who are looking for someone to improve their day or just encourage them with a slap on the back, and I have the audacity to sit in my own pitiful comfort zone because I suck at initiating conversations. A friend of mine recently told me “no risk, no reward.” As elementary as that is, it’s definitely something I need to drill into my head.
So if you ever see me and notice that I’m retreating into my shell, please wap me over the head and say “Go talk to people, woman!”