January 30, 2008

How many?

I sat in my tent. Though it was cold, the front entrance was unzipped to reveal what lay outside. It was my prized possession; practically my friend. We had been through a lot together. But alas, my white Volkswagon Vanagon had become ill. I had been driving towards the mid-west, in hopes of discovering my destiny. I was going to start a new life, meet some amazing people, and hopefully get a job. Unfortunately, old Charlie the Vanagon had something else in mind. I couldn't get him to start up again for the life of me. Maybe it was his time. Even if he was worn out, he could have at least waited until we were near civilization. As it were, I had perched my tent next to the car right where it had died; in the middle of the national forest. Flagging down a car the next morning wouldn't be too hard, but I was still quite frustrated. I didn't have much money. I certainly couldn't afford a new car. "Dang it Charlie! Why'd ya have to go and die on me now?" I said to the white hunk of metal. Apparently he had died, because he didn't reply. All I heard were the crickets. And there I sat, staring at the van through the hole in the tent.

My friend sat next to me. I had forgotten that he had come with me on this trip. He usually didn't talk to me unless I gave him my attention, so it was easy to ignore him. "Look!" I told him, shaking my finger at the vehicle. "Do you see the mess I'm in? What am I going to do now? This is ridiculous!"
I could feel his gaze and so I turned to look at him. He just stood there smiling and seemed to stifle a laugh. "You're telling me to look?" he asked. "Do you forget how smart I am? Do you forget that I've been with you on this whole entire trip? I'm pretty sure I can see what's going on. Thanks for pointing it out though." Frustrated, I turned away from him and said nothing though I knew he was right. "Come with me." he said as he grabbed my arm.
"Close your eyes."
"What? Why?"
"Just do it. Trust me."
"Fine." I consented and he lead me outside the tent. The cool air gave me goosebumps. Still holding my arm, he began to speak to me.
"You want me to look at your problems? Let me show you something. Look now."
I opened my eyes, and was greeted by the night sky sprinkled with thousands of stars. I hadn't realized earlier how bright they were tonight.
"How many stars do you see?" he asked me. "Count them."
"Funny. It's not exactly possible for me to count the stars."
Chuckling to himself, he grinned and said "That's my point. I know exactly how many stars there are. I know the name of every single one of them. And yet you tell me to look. From inside that tent there, you can't see a whole lot can you? You have a limited perspective. All you can see is that big white problem over there. But I see things from out here. I see the whole entire sky. So before you start telling me about your problems, maybe you should take a chill pill. I would hope I know what I'm doing. Haha...if not, you and all mankind are in a heap o' trouble. Haha! I crack myself up sometimes. But seriously, instead of sitting in your tent, try looking at things from out here for awhile. Change your perspective."
At that, he walked away and left me to my thoughts. I realized I had lost a lot more than a sweet car. I had lost my point of view.

I turned around and pulled my sleeping bag out of the tent. Tonight I would sleep under the stars.